Thanks a lot for following along, I'd love to stick around for a while and make more jokes/comments/whatever but it's 4am here and I'm shattered. Follow me on twitter @cbarratt94 and follow VAVEL USA Wrestling at @Wrestling_Vavel, and get in touch with us if you want to discuss the show! Good night all.
He chokeslams Sheamus too, then tombstones Rollins! And that's the show!
But no, Kane chokeslams Rollins!
KANE IS BACK! Kane is here to ruin Sheamus' cash in
Rollins went for a pedigree, Sting countered and went for the Deathlock again, but Rollins rolled him up for the three count. Expect Sheamus any second.
Rollins gets to the rope though! So so close there from Sting
Sting locks in the Scorpion Deathlock!
Sting is powerbombed into the turnbuckle AGAIN, and now the doctor is checking on him
But he can only get a two count!
SCORPION DEATH DROP
Back and forth action as it's Sting now who is on top
Rollins goes in to talk trash again but gets punched in the face, before powerbombing Sting into the turnbuckle.
Rollins is in charge now, talking trash to Sting before hitting a sling blade.
Rollins drops Sting through the Spanish announce table, then picks up his title and looks to leave, but changes his mind and starts back toward Sting.
Sting is all over Rollins here, throwing Rollins around outside the ring and not allowing the count out by climbing in and out to break the count.
Sting going straight into things, hits a Stinger Splash and locks on the Scorpion Deathlock but Rollins is at the ropes.
Here comes Sting! Legend, Icon, soon to be unable to beat an injured Seth Rollins. WWE's Sting ladies and gentlemen.
Rollins tries to leave, but Cena hits another AA and leaves him in the ring for Sting!
CENA WINS! Rollins gets cocky and goes for an AA, Cena counters into the Sethwalker, hits his middle rope leg drop and then hits an AA for the win! Hopefully this means Rollins retains the WWE title.
STF locked in! Rollins crawls to the ropes, Cena goes AA, Rollins slides out, deadlifts Cena into a package powerbomb onto the turnbuckle! Great sequence.
Rollins hits a superplex, rolls through it, and hits him with another suplex. WOW.
Cena and Rollins have incredible chemistry. This will definitely be match of the night, barring any sudden last minute Balor - Ricochet announcements.
John Cena with a sunset flip powerbomb! Magnificent stuff.
As Seth Rollins directs the crowd in a mexican wave, Cena sneaks in and tries to roll him up but Rollins gets out.
From twitter: "Let's go crossfit Jesus" best nickname ever.
Rollins is not smart and has done no such thing. Curse your arrogance Seth!
If he's smart, Rollins will just get himself disqualified straight away.
John Cena makes his way to the ring to try to win back the United States Championship. Here's a reminder that while John Cena the wrestler is terrible, John Cena the real life person is amazing and you should all watch Total Divas just for him and Daniel Bryan.
Up next, Seth Rollins must defend two titles in back to back matches!
Seth is wearing white after labor day, what a heel
Jericho with a show of disrespect to Ambrose and Reigns.
Strowman chokes out Jericho, and The Wyatt Family are victorious.
After a huge sequence, Jericho is in and goes for the codebreaker but is caught by Strowman...
Wyatt tags in Strowman as Ambrose gets across to Reigns!
Now Ambrose in the ring fighting hard, but both hit a clothesline on each other.
Jericho has the walls locked in on Bray Wyatt!
The JeriShield (patent pending) are in charge at the moment, but Roman is grabbed from behind by Strowman on the apron
Roman Reigns is looking very sweaty. That walk to the ring took a lot out of him, maybe someone should explain locker rooms to him
It's CHRIS JERICHO!
After all the hype, it's going to be a terrible reveal. Orton? Big Show? Kane? Miz?
The Almost-Shield - The New Wyatt Family is up next. Who is the mystery partner, and why is it Erick Rowan?
A clean finish as well, wow.
Charlotte wins! Charlotte wins the title! A spear in midair then locking in a figure eight hold for the win!
Nikki has stopped the comeback and is brutally working the leg again.
Charlotte starting to fight back and gain some momentum, but still only on one leg.
Nikki with an elbow off the top to the back of Charlotte's injured knee. Anyone who says she only held that title for so long because of Cena needs to actually watch the Divas matches instead of just moaning about them on Twitter.
Nikki Bella is outwrestling Ric by God Flair's daughter. What a world.
Nikki is destroying Charlotte's knee. Great strategy from the champion.
Charlotte knocked to the outside early and looks to have injured her knee slightly on the landing.
301 days of sticking it to CM Punk. Well done Nikki Bella.
It's time for the Divas match. Here's hoping Sasha Banks gets added last minute.
But The Dudleyz put Xavier Woods through the table!
Big E is calling for the tables!
Why not do that straight away Xavier? For a PhD you don't come up with ideas very quickly.
The Dudleyz hit the 3D on Kofi! Xavier Woods breaks it up and gets a DQ to retain the titles.
D-Von sure is sprightly for a 50 year old
Xavier Woods is playing the Rocky theme. Magnificent.
Bubba Ray Dudley is what I imagine Homer Simpson would look like if he were real.
The New Day call a time out, at approximately the same time as the Seahawks. Just one of the similarities between Kofi and Russell Wilson: Both get destroyed by a man from St Louis on TV pretty regularly.
Xavier Woods looks like Rufio and plays trombone. How can anyone dislike that?
Remember when everyone hated Batista coming back and getting a title shot straight away? Or The Rock? Yeah, that's how I feel about The Dudleyz.
The Tag Team Championship is on the line next, and The New Day are the perfect palate cleanser after the atrocity of that match.
Tiny Ref ejects Summer Rae, who throws her shoe at him, and hits Rusev, who is hit by a zig-zag for the loss! Let's move quickly on and get back to the good wrestling.
Rusev thinks he's beaten Ziggler off a superkick, but it was only a two count. He's having some difficulties believing that it wasn't three. Or maybe difficulties with the language barrier between himself and the referee, it's difficult to be sure.
Tony Hale has won an Emmy. WWE 2-1 Emmys #ImportantEmmysUpdates
Ziggler kicks out at 2 after a huge kick to the face. No jokes or sarcasm this time, just an actual update.
We Want Lana chants ring out. "Please, please, no Lana" that's the first time tonight King and I have agreed on something.
More interesting news than this match: the Green Bay Packers have won the coin toss. Also, Rusev slammed Ziggler and now has him in a sleeper hold. Remember when that was Ziggler's finisher for a while? That was cool.
For this match, expect either a lack of updates or just snarky comments on general things, because seriously this feud is terrible and I won't encourage it.
Dolph Ziggler's jacket - Jerry Lawler's shirt for the WWE Terrible Clothing Championship, tonight only on the WWE Network!
They did say every title would be defended, and these two have traded that title back and forth for years. Who will win in the latest chapter of this storied rivalry?
Rusev talking is the best thing ever. Summer Rae's acting is not...
Good lord Jerry Lawler what are you wearing? It's a shirt almost as bad as the Ziggler/Rusev feud! Speaking of, looks like that match is up next.
Brock Lesnar's Go To Hell Tour begins next month, starting at MSG, then on the Austin Podcast, then facing Undertaker at Hell In A Cell. WOW.
Has anyone won an Intercontinental title at the Emmys yet you may be wondering. They have not. WWE 2-0 Emmys.
OWENS WINS THE INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP! He rakes Ryback's eyes on a Shellshock attempt, and rolls him up for the three count!
Ryback is dominating Owens now after a meathook but Owens counters a Shellshock attempt as Ryback's injured shoulder gives out.
If you're following here but are interested in what's happening in the Emmys or the Green Bay - Seattle match, don't worry, I'll keep you posted! Jon Hamm is at the Emmys right now, but is HE putting Ryback in an armbar? No. Kevin Owens is. WWE 1-0 Emmys.
This should be a physical matchup, and not just because Ryback has the wrestling ability of a drunken mannequin! How does a mannequin get drunk you ask? The same way Ryback gets that physique without PEDs or steroids, it's a mystery.
The Emmys are tonight. Watching wrestling instead is clearly the way to go, you'd never see drama quite like the WWE offers in any of those Emmy shows.
We're kicking off with the Intercontinental Championship, Ryback defends against Kevin Owens. I'm surprised the US title match didn't go here, give Seth a bit of a rest between matches.
THINGS ARE HAPPENING! The opening video has a typically annoying song in the background, and fireworks are going off. Let's gooooooooo!
Well the WWE Network ad before the show featured Paige so that's a good start at least.
Right, I've got a plate of bagels, an Alpen bar, and it's almost 1AM (wooooo UK!), let's get this show on the road! Since three of my teams played and lost today, I fully expect Seth to drop both titles so be prepared for a first-hand account of my incredibly biased meltdown.
As mentioned earlier, I'm Chris Barratt and I'll be in charge of covering the show for you. After a thoroughly disappointing Eagles v Cowboys game, I am hoping for a much better PPV. What are your predictions for tonight?
Good evening ladies and gentlemen! Be sure to get in touch throughout tonight's show on Twitter, either @Wrestling_Vavel for our Twitter, or my personal Twitter @cbarratt94.
Keep following this LIVE throughout as we will lead you through all of the action tonight.
WWE Live Night of Champions Coverage
Sometime around February, after a lengthy back and forth feud between himself and Sheamus, Seth uses his leverage in The Authority to make Sheamus put his MITB briefcase on the line in an old-school open challenge, where people can pour out and all have a go at once, with whoever pins Sheamus winning the briefcase and anyone else who is pinned being eliminated. This is won by a surprising late entrant: The Undertaker. Taker cashes in for a title match at Wrestlemania, and it turns out this was all a long con by The Shield from the moment Undertaker lost at Wrestlemania, because they’re all just wrestling nerds and they all wanted to see Undertaker - Sting for the WWE Championship at Wrestlemania so Rollins came up with a two year long ruse to get it to happen. The Architect indeed. Or, you know, Seth retains.
Seth Rollins (c) vs Sting for the WWE Championship- Sting does not deserve this match. He was 0-1 all time in WWE when given this match. He’s taken it to 1-1 now, but that’s not much better. If Sting wins Sheamus cashes in, no question. There is no way WWE Champion Sting is a thing that happens in 2015. If he’d made the jump in 1996 then sure, but the only reason for him to win here is so that he can say he won the WCW, TNA and WWE titles and so that Sheamus can cash in on someone without having to feud with them. Although if you’ll permit me to take you on a ridiculous journey for a moment, here’s what should happen: Sting wins. Clean. It’ll suck for now, but it’ll be the right option in the long run. Sheamus tries to cash in, but gets battered by The Shield, who have reformed as suggested earlier.
Seth Rollins (c) vs John Cena for the United States Championship- The pessimist in me says Seth Rollins retains as a consolation prize for when he loses the WWE title later in the night. The optimist in me says Cena wins and goes back to having good-to-great matches on Raw for the title, possibly turning it into a TV title. The booking ridiculousness mind in me says that Seth rolls his statue down to the ring and has Cena wrestle that instead, possibly with Dean and Roman operating it Weekend At Bernie’s style. The other 97% of me is an unabashed Seth Rollins die-hard and says Rollins annihilates Cena, finally adopts the Phoenix Splash as a finish instead of the Hand-Me-Down Pedigree, and then beats Sting in six seconds and crowns himself King of the World. Of those three options, I’d take numbers two through four quite happily.
Or maybe this match goes before the main event, and we have a glorious double-turn as Seth Rollins reforms the Shield in this match, turning face briefly, only for Dean and Roman to stick around to help Seth whomp Sting and the whole trio goes heel and becomes Shield Classic. Maybe another developmental talent shows up to counteract Strowman, Baron Corbin would look good a swat vest. Maybe it’s Chris Jericho or Heath Slater, because why not?
The Wyatt Family (Bray Wyatt, Luke Harper and Braun Strowman) vs Dean Ambrose, Roman Reigns and a mystery partner- WHO WILL IT BE? Let’s be real, it’s probably going to be Erick Rowan which will be the single most anti-climactic thing in pro wrestling since… well, Monday’s Raw probably since WWE creative are lazy and predictable. Other thoroughly terrible options include Kane and Big Show and Randy Orton and whichever Uso isn’t injured. But let’s be dreamers! Let’s consider some more outlandish and awesome options, like Roman’s cousin The Rock! That’d be cool. Or maybe Daniel Bryan takes a break from being crippled and makes a return.
Owens has to win here, if just to get the belt as far away from Miz and Big Show as possible. It would be entirely unsurprising to see run-ins from not just Miz and Show, but also Cesaro, and Show will probably squeeze a couple of turns in there too. This would be a great chance for WWE to do something different and bring out the seldom-used Championship Scramble match, given that five people is the perfect number for it. That could be something which is decided during the show and set up with a backstage thing, and it would probably be the only time that Miz and Big Show being added to a match would be a good thing.
Ryback (c) vs Kevin Owens for the Intercontinental Championship- Despite a slight wish that Seth Rollins was in this title match too because honestly The Undisputed Intercontinental WWE Champion Of The United States And The World Seth Rollins is the kind of amazing, grandiose title that Seth Rollins should absolutely have, this has the potential to be a solid match. Owens is great, and while Ryback has always been pretty terrible he’s never really had a feud with someone who can bring the best out of him. The closest was the one with CM Punk which came when he hadn’t really done anything of note and nobody felt he deserved that shot.
The New Day (c) vs The Dudley Boyz for the Tag Team Championship- I seem to be the only person in the world who doesn’t give a damn about The Dudley Boyz. Everyone who was whining about Batista coming back and getting a title shot seems to have shut up now, despite the Dudleyz also being old and undeserving. Also, they’re 40 years old and spell “boys” with a Z. Screw the Dudleyz. The New Day are the best thing in wrestling right now, and that’s coming from someone who never liked Xavier Woods or Kofi Kingston before The New Day started their slow-burn heel turn. If The New Day don’t retain, expect a slight note of bitterness to ring through whichever match follows this one.
He threatens disqualification if Brie attacks Charlotte, while starting to count Nikki. Nikki, crafty as she is, realises that count out was never in the stipulation, and tells Brie not to attack Charlotte. Then either Charlotte tries to get her back in the ring and fails, leading to a double count out or Charlotte doesn’t realise that count out isn’t included in the stipulation and King calls her a “stupid rookie” or something similar, because he’s the worst. PS WHERE IS SASHA BANKS AND WHY IS SHE NOT IN THIS MATCH?!
Nikki Bella (c) vs Charlotte for the Divas Championship - Given the added stipulation that Nikki loses the title if she’s disqualified, I see one of two things happening: she gets disqualified and loses the title, or gets counted out and retains because seriously, that would be the most heel thing ever and it’d rock. If I’m booking it, Nikki finds herself struggling all match, and realises she’s in trouble. Despite the stip, she goes for the one move that has always worked: Twin Magic. The referee, unusually for a WWE ref, has a modicum of common sense and realises that Nikki’s body shape has completely changed and she’s grown tattoos and maybe that might be Brie Bella in the ring.
Dolph Ziggler - Rusev - Ugh. This feud has just been awful and hopefully now that Lana is out with an injury, the end might finally be in sight. The only real answer here is for Dolph to finally turn heel, given that he’s been acting like the worst human in the world for months anyway. Rusev doesn’t necessarily need to go face, but Dolph needs to do something to freshen up his character.
Kickoff match: Stardust & The Ascension vs Adrian Neville & The Lucha Dragons - Fresh off a surprisingly awesome match featuring Stephen Amell at Summerslam, Stardust and Neville are kicked to the curb that is the pre-show and have the Lucha Dragons and Ascension thrown in for some reason. What would be great here is if these guys realised that nobody is really watching for them, and just went all out stupidity with it. Stardust is the comic book villain to Amell’s Green Arrow, so make this a classic, campy Golden Age heroes and villains fight. Have Neville and the Lucha Dragons come out with spandex bodysuits, capes and eye masks (over their usual ones where relevant) and do elaborate tag team moves. Have Stardust make The Ascension dress as nondescript thugs with his logo printed somewhere on their gear, and black wool hats and eye masks. If it doesn’t mean anything, it should at least be fun.
Welcome to VAVEL’s live coverage of WWE Night of Champions! I’m Chris Barratt and I’ll be providing you with updates throughout the show. Here’s a look at the matches on show tonight: