Victor Lindelöf, penalised the week before for a point-blank handball which he knew nothing about, would have told you it couldn’t get any worse. Jose Mourinho, scarred from first-hand experience, will tell you otherwise.

It’s been a while since the handball rule aligned with logic, but on Sunday it descended into an utter farce.

As Mourinho explained in his post-match interview, Tottenham Hotspur had performed well throughout their 90 minutes against Newcastle United. With just six shots and none on target, Steve Bruce’s men had been restricted to slim pickings by Spurs, who had controlled possession comfortably, on course for a routine victory at home.

With 93 minutes on the clock, Jonjo Shelvey floats a free-kick into the penalty area. Andy Carroll, looking to salvage a point, rises high to win the ball which bounces rather innocuously off the arm of Eric Dier. There are appeals from the Newcastle players, but anyone familiar with football will tell you that, when jumping for a header, especially with another player, there is little that can be done to control your arms.

This, after all, is logic, common sense. What proceeded involved neither of those two commodities. As VAR adhered to protocol and scoured the incident for a potential handball and a potential offside, Mourinho stood poised inside the tunnel. In the 97th minute, the penalty was awarded. Mourinho watched on, ready to dart if the unthinkable materialised, if two points were snatched away right at the death.

Callum Wilson stepped up…and scored. Mourinho was off, smouldering in the bowels of Tottenham’s sleek new home. Jamie Carragher vented his frustrations on commentary for Sky Sports:

“Eric Dier jumps for the ball, has no control of where his arms are going to be, it was a header half a yard away from him, hits him on the back of his arm, he has no idea what’s going on. This is a joke.”

“Whether it’s the Premier League, the FA, FIFA, Pierluigi Collina, whoever is involved in this, stop it, because you’re ruining football for everybody. Absolute joke.”

Ever since the infamous spitting scandal that saw him face a one-year spell on the sidelines, Carragher’s analysis has been a beacon of refreshing insight within the world of punditry. This, however, was a glaring error, and, in fairness, a common one too.

Contrary to popular belief, FIFA does not come up with the game’s rules. Nor does Uefa, nor does the Premier League, nor does the FA, and nor does Pierluigi Collina, the Chairman of FIFA’s Referee’s committee.

The laws are actually controlled by the little-known International Football Association Board, also known as IFAB. Founded in 1886 to agree a common set of rules for matches between UK’s four Football Associations (England, Scotland, Ireland Wales), FIFA decided to accept the rules already established by IFAB after its own founding in 1904, and to this day, the four British FA’s retain 50% of control over the organisation.

FIFA’s representatives would eventually join IFAB, and did so 27 years after it was founded, in 1913. Initially, they only had two votes, the same number as each of the UK associations, and decisions required a 4/5 majority to pass, meaning the UK associations could still change the laws against FIFA’s wishes if they voted together.

In 1958, FIFA would join as a full member, and was given the same voting power as the original four associations put together. Any change to the laws must now be approved by ¾ of the vote, meaning FIFA’s approval is now necessary for any IFAB decision. Crucially, however, FIFA cannot change the laws alone – they would have to be agreed by at least two of the UK members.

Over the years, IFAB has overseen countless amendments. Most have been for the better, such as allowing players to stand in their own penalty area when a keeper takes a goal kick, which encourages teams to play out from the back. When it comes to the handball law, though, attempts to clear the water have had the opposite effect.

In essence, IFAB’s interpretation revolves around the positioning of the defending player’s arm, and whether it has made the body “unnaturally” bigger. The arm is defined as “everywhere from the tip of the fingers all the way up to the bottom of the armpit”, not up to the shirt sleeve as many people were wrongly led to believe.

IFAB’s definition of unnatural, though, does not tally with those of the masses. For many, unnatural refers to a deliberate handball, a concerted attempt to impede the ball’s trajectory by raising the arm out of position. Unnatural is Alex-Oxlade Chamberlain diving in the way of Eden Hazard’s shot at Stamford Bridge in 2014, it’s Luis Suarez’s goal line save against Ghana at the 2010 World Cup.

According to IFAB, though, a natural silhouette involves the arm/hand being below shoulder level, a position which any ex-player will tell you is nye-on impossible to maintain. It was this aspect of the law that Eric Dier fell foul of on Sunday as he jumped for the header with Carroll, raising his arms for leverage.

While other leagues had strictly adhered to the amendment since its implementation two years ago, English football had always taken a more lenient approach. But ever since FIFA took control of VAR protocol in July and demanded more consistency, players have been afforded less room for manoeuvre, and it all came to a head on Sunday following a spate of farcical decisions since the new season began.

Lindelöf, jockeying Jordan Ayew inside the penalty area, conceded a 74th-minute penalty at home to Crystal Palace last week after Ayew scooped the ball up onto his hand. The Swede had a split second to react and was no more than a yard away from Ayew, but the penalty was awarded nevertheless, and dispatched at the second time of asking.

Joel Ward would also fall victim, leaving manager Roy Hodgson mystified as Lucas Digne’s header thundered onto Ward’s hand and referee John Moss pointed to the spot. Ward’s arms were by his side and Hodgson, as incandescent as Roy Hodgson can possibly be, slammed the new rules as “nonsense”, explaining how he feels they are “ruining the game”.

Addressing the growing concerns about the integrity of its competition, the Premier League finally gave in and advised its referees to allow for more leeway in the handball department on Tuesday. Common sense will now be applied to the “unnaturally bigger” rule, but incidents where players have their arms above shoulder level will still be penalised. Therefore, for this season at least, the Premier League is stuck with IFAB’s law.

Reflecting on another weekend where officiating pandemonium overshadowed the football, Glenn Hoddle tweeted: “To FIFA. Can we have our game back!!”. Hoddle, though, was asking the wrong group of people.